AP — Competition remains heated between celebrity singers Amy Winehouse and Britney Spears as they vie for worldwide recognition as the celebrity female with the least going for her.

Winehouse reportedly looked up to Britney as a teenager, and has taken careful note of how successfully Spears continues to make headlines in spite of her utter lack of talent and long-dead entertainment career. “I just saw her stop performing, and saw how much attention she was getting, so I said to myself, ‘That could be my attention,’” claims Winehouse. Continue »

Oh man I can imagine the scene.

Her, tense, eyes incapable of focusing on any one thing for too long. They dart from your eyes to your hands to your seething bulge, and back again before anyone even notices. She sits, quietly wondering if you notice the opening she’s left.

Of course, nothing gets by Yardsale. You’ve been toying with her this entire time, guiding her down a path she thinks she’s choosing for herself, not yet knowing the inevitability of her defeat or your naked embrace. Continue »